Quarters in the Jar

To snark, it will cost you a quarter...unless it's true.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Lukewarm Turkey

I have never liked the taste of water. I know water doesn't taste. But, I grew up in a college town where students buy bottled water by the gallon, just to avoid drinking from the tap. So, yeah it does taste, and it's bad. Currently, I have well water which in most cases doesn't taste or even tastes sweet. Not our water. My dad won't even drink it because he thinks it smells like eggs. I just don't care for it. So, all this time (my whole adult life) I have consumed Diet Coke like it was water. Not exactly the picture of good nutrition.

Apparently, this causes the breakdown of tooth enamel which in turn causes cavities. Which in turn cost extra money. This leads me to my declaration. I am going to cut my soda consumption to once a week. Notice I didn't say caffeine (I don't know if I could function without it, and I don't think my students want to be the ones who find out if I can). No more trips to the pop machine on plan...no more Diet Coke and air lunches...no more. I'll be crabby at first, but in the long run dentures are hard to maintain, and I'm pretty sure toothless would not be a good look on me.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Are they dry, yet?

Well...the awesomeness that is a home renovation continues on into its second full week. That being said, I had to go to the laundromat yesterday. Yuck. When I first got out of the truck, the fact that there were NO OTHER PEOPLE at the laundry should have alarmed me. The laundries in our neighboring town were packed. "That's odd," is what I thought. Who am I to listen to anyone? Including, but not limited to, my inner voice. So, I dragged my eight baskets of clothing into the laundry (Hey, a family of four wears a lot over the course of nine days). I got my change...15 dollars should do it, right?, and jumped in.

After I started the NINE washers, I settled in with my Glamour. I told you all I would do some trashy reading whilst the wash was going. Before I knew it, all the washers were finished. Now that I think about it, I really am starting to question the cleanliness of my clothes because I'm almost pretty sure that my washer in the kitchen takes a little longer on the wash cycle. Hmmm.

Then it was on to the dryers. Oh, the dryers. My, my, my. Where to begin? Let me start with how I put money into dryer #7, and all it did was rattle. There was no sign indicating it was out of order. Then I, after fiddling with the machine a bit (no one likes to be beaten by a dryer for goodness sake), got a wee bit smarter. Put only one quarter in until it starts, then and only then add money. Which leads me to the question just how many quarters does it take to dry my sweaters? Let me tell you, I was dropping quarters in the dryers like a senior citizen playing the slots after "eating their money's worth" at Harrah's buffet. Let me also tell you...$15 does not get your clothes dry. Nor does $18. But, it does get them dry enough to take home after you look at the clock and realize there are two hours of your life you can't get back, and you don't want to lose any more.

The good news in all of this is that I probably won't have to go to the laundry next week because ALL of the tile are put down. We might grout tonight or DH can do it without me tomorrow. Reason 5,000 I love training at night. This will put the washer/dryer back around Thursday. Yay! Who knew I would get so excited to do laundry?

Oh, and by the way...dryer 7? I told a nice old lady who came in as I was leaving not to use it, and get this. She said, "Oh, that one has been out of order for months!"

Saturday, January 23, 2010

I guess she liked my dance moves

Ok, as an elementary teacher, I know that February is the time when we start to look at seed catalogs (or at least I do, but I'm not planting any cucumbers this year because we still have about eight jars of pickles...we won't be hurting for dill in the apocalypse, right Reading Goddess?), no one wants to be inside because we have exhausted the "fun" that is the teacher's cabinet of Uno, Jenga and the like, and last but not least, love begins to blossom in the classroom. I like to blame the beginnings of love on all those conversation heart messages that are constantly in your face at Wal-Mart. I would be flattered if I was seven and someone wrote URAQT to me. It gets the kids to thinking...hmmm...."How can I push my teacher right on over the edge? Clearly talking constantly hasn't worked yet."

Which brings me to the point. Last night, my first grade son declared his undying love for another first grade girl. Irrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrk (brakes slamming in case you couldn't tell). This is how it went. He said, "Little girl broke up with little boy in my class, and now she's my girlfriend. I think I love her." I tried my best not laugh/cry and asked, "Well, that's nice, how did it happen?" He told me a tale of being partnered with her in music for their dancing unit and it went from there. I know three things. First, I wasn't ready for this. He has liked other girls before. But, not in a 'have a first grade romance' way. Second, it's not February, yet, so he is getting an early start on the lovefest that is a classroom at Valentine's. Last, his teacher is going to kill me.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Let's build something together

Or, I have an even better idea! Let's not build something ourselves, but hire it done and tell everyone that we did it ourselves. But then I wouldn't have anything to write about today. For those of you who don't know, my husband and I thought we would use the three day weekend to retile our back hallway. Notice that I am writing this on Thursday. We are not done. I don't think we are too terribly close to being done either. My washer and dryer are in my kitchen. It all started when we ripped up the sticky tiles from the floor. There was an unidentified stain underneath. I'm not talking about a teeny-tiny stain. I'm talking about a Hey didn't I see something like this on Forensic Files stain? We determined it was not blood and moved on. Then, we thought... Let's rip out the walls because they are out of square and warped. That shouldn't take too awfully long, right? So the walls have been replaced, and we are laying the tile. The washer and dryer should be out of the kitchen by this time next week. Anyone want to go to the laundromat with me? No takers? Too bad because I would have bought you an Enquirer to read while we were there. Now I know what you are thinking. This is supposed to be a teacher blog. Not Frau complaining about all the hard work she is doing at home. Doing this job has taken me back to a huge (actually epic is a better word) argument I had with my ex-brother-in-law. He tried to tell me once that laborers work harder than teachers, and I totally got all red faced and told him what for. I just knew that teachers work wayyyy harder. Today, I'm not so sure because I am TIRED. Physically, I am soft compared to construction workers. I know I don't lift and carry things all day like they do. The math involved in any construction is not easy. However, they don't manage the education of 24 beavers (some not so eager). Maybe, just maybe, we work equally hard. Just in different ways. Dang it. I hate to admit when I'm wrong.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Oh weather, why do you hate me?

As my faithful reader (thanks Mom) already knows, we had snow, followed by snow, followed by frigid temperatures here in the middle of the country. That only spells one thing for my friends. You know it...indoor recess. I don't mind having recess duty. Really, I mean it. I love fresh air. I love being outside. I do not love, however, being stuck in my classroom with 48 small people trying to entertain themselves with my small collection of games and scratch paper. Kids need to be outside.

On that note here is my list of: Top 5 Bad Indoor Recess Ideas
1. Running with scissors relay race
2. Half hour of Quaker's Meeting game
3. Really hard word charades
4. Arm wrestling tournament
5. Writing the sentence, "When the snow melts, we will play outside." over and over and over

It is supposed to be in the upper thirties later this week, so who knows if we will get to go out. But, we can hope.

Friday, January 8, 2010

But, I don't want to go to school in June!

Alas, according to the district calendar, I will. You see, today is the second snow day (seriously, it's like I didn't shovel at all yesterday) thus far. We only have one make up day scheduled in before we start going into June. So after the fun that is Parent/Teacher conferences until 8PM for TWO DAYS IN A ROW. We will haul our tired little selves to teach, teach, teach (and definitely not show a double feature). That will be make up day number 1.

Don't get me wrong, we have days off between day 1 and June, but they are not make up days. Martin Luther King and all the presidents ever still get to be honored and celebrated. Really, I wouldn't mind using one of those, or even Good Friday (making it "OK Friday"), if it meant I didn't have to go to school in June. It's like some sort of mental block for me. SCHOOL?! in JUNE?! Pigs are flying?! Does not compute. June is for summer school. Which, I don't teach (even though those extra dollars would be a nice addition to my bank account come August).

Yes, yes I hear you rest of the working world. I am fully aware that all of you have to do your jobs in the summer. However, you do not work with small children for seven hours a day, go home to worry about said children, and use your off time working on ways to make these same children better. I'm going out on a limb here, but I would venture to say the majority of you non-public servant types leave your job at your office/cubicle/grill/whatever. Point being, I deserve June in its entirety.

This whole snow day thing is like buying a fancy Kate Spade on credit. You get your new purse (sleep in until the kids complain that they are hungry) right then, but the bill does come due, eventually. Bah.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Too many sweets will spoil your dinner

The dinner of course being the learning that has to happen before any of my friends can even think about Third Grade. The sweets would be our third straight day of late start tomorrow. I came home so tired today because I crammed seven hours of learning into just five. Rock star, I know, but it has to be done.

Even though there was a significant amount of cramming, finger snapping, and utterances of, "Chop, chop." from me, something had to give. Sorry science, you got the boot today. My good friend who I will lovingly refer to as Ms. Kite (because teaching with her is like teaching with one) barely ever touched science or social studies and yet, around 75% of her class performs proficient or advanced on the state assessment. So...needless to say, I don't have feelings of guilt about skipping content every now and then.

Aside from the curriculum expectations, the end of the quarter is quickly approaching. There are checklists to check. Assessments to give. Benchmark books to hear read. AAAAAAAAAH! The only shiny moment of this assessorama (sounds like a sale on purses and belts, doesn't it?) came when the Reading Goddess said we didn't have to do the 5 billion sight word list this quarter.

So...for tomorrow, I will continue to push as hard as possible to get the job done. Maybe, just maybe the weather will turn, and we can get back to our balanced diet of seven hour days with a teeny tiny amount of wiggle room.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Stay of execution

My husband answers the phone on the second ring. I am sitting across the living room holding my breath. I hear the distinctive voice of Ms. Third grade teacher (the one who is right before me on the calling tree). I can barely contain myself as he hands me the phone, "Talk to me Ms. Third," I say. She tells me the news...wait for it...LATE START! This means, I get to sleep in because I don't have to be in my classroom until 9:45. Didn't I just post how great that would be? Do I have more influence than I think? Then I call Creative Genius (aka rockstar across the hall). She asks for the "good news". I tell her and we laugh. I know my husband thinks I'm a total loon. This much joy and happiness for two extra hours. I know those who don't teach don't get it. I, like many of my supercolleagues did not darken the door of my classroom for any part of break. To me, going in on vacation is like taking your laptop to the beach. I did some work from home, but not nearly enough to bring my A game tomorrow. So this little late start is EXACTLY what I needed/prayed for.

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Saturday, January 2, 2010

How awesome was that?

Reason number 8 million I love my husband: he bought me a massage package from the day spa. I went today and let me tell you, I'm going to need to do that at least once a week. Or more.